Writing in Plain Language, Part 3: Heading and List Logic

Imagine receiving this excerpt of an audit report: 

Bankers, Inc. reconciliations are neither consistently timely nor accurate. Reconciliations require submission within 24 hours and execution with 100% accurately. Of 2,086 reconciliations, 98 were late (4.7%) and 109 were inaccurate (5.2%). 

Despite implementing a new procedure to safeguard against late and inaccurate reconciliations, the audit revealed internal controls remain poor, and shared responsibilities among different departments make checks difficult. 

These lapses may subject the auditee to IRS penalties, and run the risk of misappropriating receipts, exposing the firm to client lawsuits. 

Therefore, management should centralize reconciliations under the CFO, create greater redundancy in accuracy checks, document daily oversight, submit all reconciliations within 24 hours, submit all reconciliations with 100% accuracy, and resolve inaccurate reconciliations with the Bank within 30 days. Doing so will avoid IRS penalties, ensure proper appropriation of all funds, promote operational efficiency, and retain clients. 

Management should respond within five business days with an action plan on these six recommendations.We will conduct a follow-up audit on bank reconciliations within one month.

The logic of the narrative gets lost in the dense paragraph. Note this second draft, which has not changed an idea of the narrative.

Finding
Bankers, Inc. reconciliations are neither consistently timely nor accurate. Reconciliations require submission within 24 hours and execution with 100% accurately. Of 2,086 reconciliations, 98 were late (4.7%) and 109 were inaccurate (5.2%).

Causes
Despite implementing a new procedure to safeguard against late and inaccurate reconciliations, the audit revealed:

• Poor internal controls can lead to late or inaccurate reconciliation.
• Shared responsibilities among different departments make checks difficult. 

Risks
These lapses subject the auditee to the following risks:

• IRS penalties
• client lawsuits
• misappropriated receipts

Recommendations
To avoid IRS penalties, ensure proper appropriation of all funds, promote operational efficiency, and retain clients, management should take these six remedial actions:

1. Centralize reconciliations under the CFO.
2. Create greater redundancy in accuracy checks.
3. Document daily oversight.
4. Submit all reconciliations within 24 hours.
5. Submit all reconciliations with 100% accuracy.
6. Resolve inaccurate reconciliations with the Bank within 30 days.  

Response
Management should respond within five business days with an action plan on these six recommendations. We will conduct a follow-up audit on bank reconciliations within one month.

Although the second draft consumes more space, it is far more readable. Using headings and lists enables easy scanning and greater retention. While the language of either draft may seem identical, the plain language principal of formatting does highlight the narrative better for the reader.